It Had To Come To This

In January 2017, I posted a note on Facebook where I talked about quitting comics. That post got a lot of exposure, more than what any of my posts usually get. With that kind of response, one would think that there's still hope.

However, close to two years later, yesterday, I posted this on Facebook.

Unless a miracle happens, I'll be stopping after Zaturnnah sa Maynila. Making comics has been an interesting roller coaster ride, with its highest of highs and lowest of lows. Thanks to everyone who supported me every step of the way. May you be blessed always..

Note that I'm still wishing that a miracle would happen, though miracles tend to be, well, rare.

I've wrestled with this over the past two years to the point of depression. Yes, that's how much making comics, a twenty-plus-year relationship, meant to me. When I would be that close to throwing in the towel, something surprising would happen, a sort of sign that would prop me up into trying again.

Just this year, I did a bunch of pages for Zaturnnah in Maynila part three. I finished the English translation of the first book (just the script; the artwork's another thing entirely), the screenplay for the film reboot, and squeezed in a translation for that as well. Zaturnnah was also featured in the marketing materials of fashion brand Tygie, A major highlight of the year was the Zaturnnah art and furniture exhibit of Space Encounters. So many good things.

But the issue of money has always been a thorn. It's hard to make pages when you get a disconnection notice, when there's nothing much in the fridge, when there are other people depending on you financially.

These past few weeks, I came up with another business model for comics, based on a few strategies I've tested. While fiddling with Google sheets and prepping the slides, I paused and thought, "What am I doing? What's this for?"

One of the slides...

Correction: I know what I was doing. I was trying to solve a problem. Get my thoughts down and organized. I was honestly excited about the plan. But, the realist knocked the hell out of the idealist. It's not gonna work. No one will take this plan seriously.

So... I'm done. In marketing speak, there's very little demand for what I have to offer. More people talk about my theater work than my comics work. So my last comics projects will be Zaturnnah sa Maynila, and posting the first book online.

There are so many issues and concerns tied to this, not just about me but the entire comics scene and the market, issues I'd rather not talk about anymore because nobody really listens. I've already said so much over the past years, some of which I wish I could take back. Right now, the last thing I want to be is a bitter ranter.

What will I be doing next? Well, I've got a list. At least I'll be having more time.

So to those who supported me and my comics through thick and thin, thank you. Zaturnnah thanks you.